Tag Archives: advice

I Should Have Guest It Wasn’t Free

A wedding invitation is akin to a golden ticket. Your choice to include the recipient in this milestone of your life shows their importance. However, most brides, nor guests don’t initially realize these come with a price. Here is a short breakdown of some of the expenses:

Attire: Most buy a new outfit. Everyone wants to look their best and spend on average $155 on something special. If there is a dress code, it likely will be more. Your bridal party also must pay for their ceremony dresses too.

Gifts: Presents are typically given whether one can attend or not. The range is $50 to $100 for a friend and $150+ for those closer or family. The ladies (or gentlemen) who go to your shower and/or bachelorette party usually give additional items.

Travel: Guests from out of town have more expenses due to accommodations, flights etc. Prices of travel have increased exponentially due to the pandemic and space is limited. If the time can be turned into a vacation, many find the costs more budget friendly and easier to save for.

Other: Members of the wedding party usually foot the bill for the bridal shower and bachelorette party.  If you have a cash bar at your reception, tabs can quickly add up. If you choose a child-free wedding, some will have to find babysitters. The list goes on.

Statistics: A 2022 survey showed most people were invited to an average of four weddings a year and spent as much as $3,000 attending each. Nearly two-thirds of guests feel financially stressed. 37% said they couldn’t afford a present or new outfit and one-third had to decline attending because of the costs.

Nothing is impossible with things such as pay-later programs, establishing a wedding guest fund in one’s budget or renting rather than buying. Keep in mind, if some you care about can’t share in your big day, it’s likely nothing personal and they will be there in spirit.

Minimal Assistants


It goes without saying that, as a bride, you likely have a plan (or at least a clear vision) in place regarding most of your wedding day details. Making your ideas come to life may be challenging for many reasons leaving you wishing for sole responsibility over every component. Unfortunately, that is an impossibility as outside help, whether from friends and family or hired professionals, is required. However, every decision including the amount of assistance you want or need and from whom it comes is yours to make.

Remember that the period leading up to your special day is not just exciting for you but for those close to you as well. Many will offer their time, advice and skills to ease your burden and lower your stress level. While usually successful, occasionally their good intentions lead to uncomfortable situations and hurt feelings.

One objective of your wedding is for your guests to enjoy themselves which includes being able to take in everything going on around them. If someone offers to provide their services on the day of for something other than what you want, kindly pointing out some of the special things they would miss is a great way to decline the offer while avoiding being offensive.

Unsolicited offers will not just come for your ceremony and reception but may arise throughout the planning process too. Fortunately, those are easier to handle. During this time, you can include the individual(s) in different yet equally meaningful ways making it seem as if you are not being dismissive. For example, if your mom is determined for you to wear her veil and your heart is set on a birdcage, invite her to help you choose just the right one and offer to sew a piece of the veil inside your gown or to use it as a wrap around your bouquet.

All intentions are good when those who love you offer a lending hand as difficult as that may periodically be to keep in mind. However, it is the one day that all attention is on you and your future husband. Therefore, while always doing so kindly and with consideration, you should not feel guilty for ensuring that what you envisioned is exactly what materializes.