Tag Archives: wedding gifts

The ABCs of Registries

Who doesn’t love getting gifts especially when you choose them yourself? Wedding registries might be the only time you get to do so but some things that should be considered when making them are for your guests.

Complete your registry at least six months before your wedding so everyone has time to choose what to get you for not only your big day but engagement parties, showers etc. Also, being such a special gift, invitees don’t want to rush at the last-minute or get you something other than what they’d like because of a time crunch.

Register for enough gifts to give your guests options but don’t go overboard and choose things on a whim you’d never use. The number of items needs to be at least equivalent to your guest count. An easy way to achieve that is by breaking down sets (such as cookware) into individual pieces.

Items of all price ranges should be included even if your guests tend to be generous. You don’t want anyone to feel uncomfortable if gifts are out of their budget. Many smaller ticket items can be creatively combined in fun ways to look more lavish.

Personal items should remain just that and not be included. As much as you may want a new wardrobe for your honeymoon, your registry is not an appropriate place to ask for it. Request things you and your fiancé can share now and in the future. However, there’s no harm in asking for a nice camera to capture the adventures you will share or items to entertain as your lifestyle will be changing.

Thank each person within two weeks of receiving a gift. Although you will be very busy with planning (and life in general), doing so will keep you from getting overwhelmed down the line and ensure that no one falls through the cracks.

Your registry isn’t a secret but never include it on your invitation. Instead, it should be shared by your family, bridal party or wedding website (if you have one). You will appreciate the thought and consideration put into each item you choose as they will last for years to come and remind you of this special time in your life.

Here’s to You

Seemingly, your wedding day is all about YOU as it is the day YOU have dreamt of your entire life, the day YOU have lost sleep over, stressed about every detail of and, for the most part, YOU are the focus of. However, in actuality, has nothing to do with YOU as it is a symbol of YOU becoming WE and, without your fiancé, there wouldn’t even be a wedding. Show your partner in life how much he means to you by giving him a meaningful gift on your special day that will last as long as your marriage and be a reminder of your love for him.

Have his closest friends and family make short videos (which can be easily done on their phones and sent to you) sharing how they met, why they love him so much, a favorite memory and some words of wisdom for your future together. Compile all of them into a single movie, play it at the reception and your thoughtfulness will knock his socks off.

Make arrangements for a guest who had to decline your invitation, leaving your groom feeling really upset, to make a surprise appearance. If they did so due to financial constraints, pay for their travel. If the reason was a prior commitment, reach out to them and let them know just how much their presence would mean and how disappointed your fiancé was to learn they would be unable to attend. Not only is it a gift to both your husband and the guest but also to you when you see the excitement and joy on his face.

Keep a journal of what has led up to your ceremony including each decision and the reasons behind them, the smallest ways he has made the stress of the entire process worth every second, how you have chosen things to incorporate his tastes and the excitement the experience has evoked about spending your life together. It is a tangible demonstration of both your devotion and commitment and he will be touched by how much you did to make your wedding flawless.

Of course the type of gift you give your future husband is both endless and easily personalized dependent upon his likes and dislikes. One thing it is not dependent upon is a budget as, whether you can afford to spend a million dollars or merely pennies, the importance of the gift is the sentiment behind it and the demonstration that, while most people were focused on you, you were focused on him.

All in the Families

Your wedding symbolizes the beginning of a life with your husband filled with new adventures, traditions, memories and, most likely, children of your own. It is also a blending of two existing families as you become a member of your husband’s and he does yours. This special time is a very appropriate one to remind your family that your bond and loving relationship will continue to grow.

When making your registry list, casually ask your parents what they would want if they were to get married again. Keep the response in mind and purchase it for them as a surprise (don’t add it to your list or they will likely find out). Doing so is a fun way to include your parents in your planning while giving them a keepsake of their own choosing without their even knowing.

Personalized handkerchiefs are appropriate for both of your parents and come in handy to wipe away tears during your ceremony. Additionally, thoughtful embroidered messages show your gratitude for the role they have played in your life to date as well as remind them that you will continue to nurture and treasure that relationship.  

One way to demonstrate the joining of your family with that of your husband’s in a creative and sentimental way also requires a bit of secrecy and snooping. Each of you need to ask friends and family which song your respective parents played for their first dance. After the two of you have danced to the one of your own choosing, play each of theirs. This shows that, as your new life begins, it does not do so as a party of two, but as a party of too many to count.

Your future in-laws should not be forgotten and perhaps the most meaningful token of appreciation is a handwritten note. Express to them not only your excitement about what lies ahead with their son, but your gratitude for their acceptance of you, and most importantly, for the wonderful job they did raising the one person who makes you complete.

Parents sometimes fear that they are “losing” their son or daughter once he/she gets married (perhaps it comes from the notion of “giving away”) rather than seeing it as gaining another child. With time, that fear dissipates but, small gestures on your part can keep it from ever arising.

Getting Equals Giving

Your wedding day is one for which you spend countless time planning and focusing on every tiny aspect. It is also an occasion when others give presents as well as of themselves to ensure everything turns out exactly as you imagine it will. What may not cross your mind is that it is a wonderful opportunity to give back to others.

Consider donating your flowers to a nursing home, hospital or other charitable organization as you won’t use them again and they will certainly brighten the day of many who would be far beyond appreciative of the gesture.

Most likely, you will put your dress in the closet and perhaps take it out occasionally as a remembrance of the commitment and love shared with your spouse but will never be worn again. There are countless women who cannot afford a dress. What a wonderful gift it would be to endow yours to a place dedicated to helping those who are forced to scrimp, save, delay their special day or never have it occur due to not being able to have either the dress of their dreams or one at all.

Pay it forward by giving time in the same way that your family and others who did for you to ones that don’t have individuals in their lives to do the same with planning, organizing, decorating, etc.

The most beautiful way to start off your life with your soul mate is by knowing that you have given of yourself so someone else has the same opportunity to do so with theirs.