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Not Your First Choice

July 14, 2011

You’ve found the perfect guy and can’t imagine spending a single day without him. He gets down on his knee and asks you to marry him and the ring is the ugliest thing you’ve ever seen. What do you do now? First of all, don’t panic or get angry. You are not alone and it happens more often than you would believe.

Consider the source. If it is a family heirloom or something that has a lot of sentimental value to him, he gave it to you for a reason.  Consider yourself lucky and take some time to think about whether or not it is something you could grow to love before you immediately mention your dislike for it.

Is it a conversation you have had before? If the two of you have never discussed engagement rings or your preferences, you can’t expect him to be a mind reader. In that case, his feelings probably won’t be hurt if you voice your opinion and decide to return it for something that is more to your liking.

How much do you value his opinion? Maybe you envisioned a square cut and he chose a pear shape. You wanted a simple setting and he surrounded the main diamond with a million small ones (wouldn’t that be nice) because he thought it was perfect for you. You have to remember that most men don’t buy a ring on a whim. They put a lot of thought and effort into their purchase, ask their friends and family (and probably yours too).

It is a fine line to walk because you will wear your wedding every day for the rest of your life and it’s important that you think it’s beautiful but the question is whether or not something is attractive because you think it is or because of the sentiment and thought behind it.

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